| Whether you realize it or not, almost everything you | | | | Furthermore, hope gives you enthusiasm, which in |
| do is directed at trying to increase your happiness. | | | | turn, makes you feel alive, vital and energetic. |
| When you select a mate, buy a house or a car, or | | | | Indeed, when you have something to look forward |
| even a new hat, you are hoping that they will make | | | | to each day, you wake up in the morning filled with |
| you happier. Strangely, though, despite all the hope | | | | energy and enthusiasm -- sure the day is going to be |
| and effort that is directed at happiness, few people | | | | a great one. This is the kind of feeling you want. |
| are truly happy. A survey taken in 2004 showed that | | | | Making it Happen |
| less than 30% consider themselves very happy. | | | | Now that we know the three major things that give |
| Why is there so much unhappiness? Where does it | | | | happiness, how do you make it happen? You can't |
| come from? We are not born unhappy; young | | | | just hope it will happen, and you can't suddenly just |
| children are usually quite happy. The truth is: we learn | | | | "decide" to be happy, and expect success. You have |
| how to be unhappy as we grow up and grow older. | | | | to take action. |
| Most of our unhappiness is "manufactured;" it's a | | | | Lincoln once said, "People are about as happy as they |
| result of our thinking. This is a pity, since life already | | | | make up their minds to be." There is a grain of truth |
| comes with many problems -- why do we have to | | | | in this, but merely "making up your mind" won't make |
| add to them with manufactured unhappiness. | | | | you happy unless you do something about it. But |
| Happiness is important to everybody, and everybody | | | | happiness is, indeed, produced by thoughts and |
| strives for it, and it is good for you in so many ways: | | | | attitudes. So one of the first things you're going to |
| we think better, feel better, perform better, and are | | | | have to do is deal with them. |
| healthier when we are happy. So people want it. But | | | | Let's begin by listing the traits of a happy person. |
| happiness doesn't "just happen." You have to work | | | | (We'll start with the three above.) |
| at it. | | | | |
| Many things are needed for happiness, but three | | | | 1. Has someone to love. |
| basic things are so overwhelming that without them | | | | 2. Has a feeling of complete engagement in his work |
| you cannot be happy. They are: | | | | and so on. In fact, he loves it. |
| - Someone to love | | | | 3. Looks forward to the future. |
| - Something to do that you really love | | | | 4. Is at peace with himself. |
| - Something to look forward to It's important to | | | | 5. Has a passion for life. |
| note the "love" is mentioned in two of them, and | | | | 6. Feels gratitude. |
| they are the reason that love is needed for | | | | 7. Takes pleasure in small things. I'm expanding on the |
| happiness. Let's look at each of them. | | | | first three here, but for the most part, the last four |
| Somebody to Love | | | | result when you have the first three. They are a |
| It's well-known that people are happier, amd in most | | | | dividend. When you have the first three you are |
| cases they are healthier, when they have someone | | | | certainly at peace with yourself. You have no inner |
| to love. This doesn't mean just a spouse, or girlfriend | | | | turmoil; you're not fighting the world -- you accept it, |
| or boyfriend; it also includes children, grandchildren, | | | | and you feel great. You have a passion for life, and |
| and friends. And it can also include pets. Most happy | | | | you feel energetic, vital and alive. Life has meaning. |
| people have strong ties to family and friends. People | | | | You are grateful for, and appreciative of all the things |
| with no ties are, in fact, frequently lonesome, and | | | | you have. You are continually thinking about how |
| many develop depression. Being around people almost | | | | lucky you are -- not bemoaning the fact that you're |
| always lifts your spirits; most people are happier | | | | not rich, or have a few aches and pains. You're |
| when they're with somebody. | | | | grateful for your health, your financial security, your |
| So love is important in relation to happiness, but it | | | | family, your friends and all the material things you |
| must be a reciprocal relation. A one-way relationship | | | | have. Finally, you take pleasure in small things: |
| won't necessarily bring unhappiness, but it is much | | | | sunsets, rainbows, beautiful flowers, music, and even |
| less satisfactory. | | | | the tiny grains of sand on the beach. |
| Closely associated with love is "being needed." People | | | | So, how do you achieve all this? According to |
| are also happy when they feel they are needed. | | | | Norman Vincent Peale: "You keep your heart free |
| Being needed gives life more meaning, and it gives | | | | from hate, mind free from worry. Live simply, expect |
| you a feeling of satisfaction and confidence. | | | | little, give much. Fill your life with love. Forget |
| Something To Do That You Love | | | | yourself, think of others." |
| This is also sometimes referred to as "engagement," | | | | This is, indeed, good advice, and I'd have a hard time |
| and it refers to your depth of involvement with your | | | | improving on it. The first thing you have to |
| work, hobbies and even your family. Being | | | | remember, though, is that happiness (or unhappiness) |
| involved,and enjoying what you do -- or more to the | | | | is a result of your thoughts and attitude. So change |
| point -- loving what you do, is also critical for | | | | them if you have to. A few other things that will help |
| happiness. It's important to keep busy, but this is | | | | are: |
| more than merely keeping busy. This is loving what | | | | |
| you do, and the best way to achieve it is to set | | | | 1. Keep the three things I mentioned at the beginning |
| goals and work towards them. People are happiest | | | | of the article in mind, and strive to achieve them. |
| when they have goals, and while they are trying to | | | | 2. Keep the seven traits of a happy person in mind. |
| achieve them there is little time to get bored. People | | | | Think about them and try to emulate them. |
| who are frequently bored, and have little to do, soon | | | | 3. Act happy -- smile whenever possible. |
| become dissatified, which quickly leads to | | | | 4. Get enough sleep |
| unhappiness. | | | | 5. Set goals and strive to accomplish them. |
| With goals, you are always thinking about them, so | | | | 6. Cultivate close relationships. They are critical for |
| your thoughts are always positive. Furthermore, | | | | happiness. |
| thinking about what lies at the end of the rainbow | | | | 7. Accept the fact that life isn't fair. Everyone is dealt |
| when you achieve your goals always gives you a | | | | a different hand at birth. Make the most of the one |
| good feeling | | | | you were dealt. |
| Something To Look Forward To | | | | 8. You can't be happy if you are not relaxed. So, |
| If you have goals you will obviously have something | | | | relax. |
| to look forward to, and having something to look | | | | 9. Take care of your body. If you don't, you may |
| forward to is the same as having hope for the | | | | get aches and pains that can make you miserable. |
| future. And no one can be truly happy without hope. | | | | 10. |