Missing Her Childhood - The Homeschooling Early College Myth

When my daughter entered full-time college at agethen got to take a break, walk around campus, relax
13 we heard all types of warnings from people aboutand get a snack .... on her own without teachers
how it was a shame that she would miss out on ascolding her not to talk .... without a hall pass. She got
"normal" childhood and wasn't it a shame that sheto learn to make her own decisions and put her
would not be allowed to just "be a kid." Thediscipline into practice without a parent or teacher
comments did make me think about the situation webeating her over the head to do her work. It is, in
were entering and I did sometimes wonder if theremy opinion, a great age to learn to be responsible for
would be any damage done once she got older.oneself. She also had the opportunity to gain the
However, I was convinced that what we were doingrespect and respect people of all ages. Just as you
was the only option and so we moved forward.and I do not meet and greet people by sharing our
To date, it has been eight years since my daughterages, neither did she. So she went through most of
entered college. She recently turned 21 and willher college life without many people knowing her age.
complete her Master's degree this Spring. I have sinceOf course, she would always tell them if they asked.
gone back to college for my third degree and haveBut most of the time they didn't. So she interacted
had the opportunity to talk to many people aboutjust as any normal college student would.
the early college process. After all these years, IAfter hearing about the great success my daughter
asked my daughter if she had it to do over again,has had, most doubters at this point will inevitably
would she? I asked if she felt as if she missed outsay "Well she was a special case then. Surely, she did
on anything by not going to high school. Her answer:not miss out on her childhood. But, other children who
Yes, she would do it again without any hesitation.have entered college probably did not have the same
And, no she does not feel as if she missed out on aexperiences as your daughter." Watch my eyes roll.
"normal" childhood. To her, she did have a normalWe do know other children who have entered
childhood. What prompted me to write this articlecollege around the age of 12 and 13. I assure you,
was that one of my co-workers who has worked inthey do not have three heads and their experiences
education for many years said "It's a shame yourare quite similar. Yes, there is the occasional child who
daughter had to miss out on a normal childhood."did not have the wonderful experiences that my
Years later, after my daughter and I had alreadydaughter and the others have had. I have seen a
determined that we had not only made a goodfew children who have been damaged by being
decisions, but that we had made the BEST decisionhome schooled or accelerated, but they are very
and would follow the exact same course again, I wasfew and very far between.
still hearing the same warning, the same "its such aWould I recommend early college for your child? I
shame."can only share that it was a great experience for us
One of the other accelerated kids was on TVand I know of others who have had great
recently and I heard a reporter say the same thing.experiences too. Only you know your child. It is,
"Yes, she has accomplished a lot, but you have toindeed, a huge leap for a 13 year old to interact with
wonder. What about her childhood?" I just shake mycollege aged students and professors. In my
head when I hear it now. I realized that the peopleexperience, only very mature kids should attempt it.
who are usually saying it have never even met anThere are a lot of mature kids out there. I've met
accelerated child. They've never been exposed tomany kids who I feel would do very well in the
that world at all... So, they really are irresponsiblycollege environment. However, each kid is different
giving their "expert" opinion on things that they knowand the most important thing in contemplating early
absolutely nothing about.college is that your child needs to be on board with
I can say that my daughter did miss out on somethe amount of dedication it takes to be a success in
things by not going to high school. She missed out oncollege. He or she needs to be willing to put in the
being exposed to drugs and alcohol. She missed outlong hours of studying and meet deadlines. He or she
on being exposed to other kids who don't takeneeds to be able to focus on a topic for a three
school seriously and who misbehave. She missed outhour period and be able to absorb the class time as
on cliques. She missed out on gang violence. Sheany college level student would.
missed out on sitting in a classroom, being told not toAh, I hear the doubters now saying it is too much
talk from 8 to 2:45 every day.work for a young child to have to do. Sorry, wrong
My daughter's childhood was filled with after schoolagain. When compared to the nonsense work that
activities. She was on the soccer team with kids herkids in high school have to do, it comes out to the
own age. They practiced three to four days a week.same amount of work. The difference is that the
She was in dance class three to four days a week.college work must be formatted and presented in a
She took art. She was in the band. She went tomore professional and polished manner than the high
summer camp. All with kids her own age. She talkedschool work. College students get to take breaks and
on the computer, had friends over and always hadhave a few days to complete assignments. High
loads of kids over for birthday parties. She was aSchool kids usually have homework assigned that day
founding member of the Police Explorers in our townand due the next day. I think that is much more
where she interacted with lots of kids every weekpressure to have to deal with. College students also
and throughout the summer. She knocked on doorsget a syllabus of the entire semesters' work so that
for Halloween and participated in Christmas parties. Ithey can schedule their time properly. I very rarely,
would like to know what people think she wasalmost never, see that kind of forethought and
missing after all of those activities. She also lived on aplanning in a high school situation.
college campus for two years, so she did not missIf we had the choice to do it over, we'd both do it
out on college life. What is it that other kids do, thatagain. As a matter of fact, we both say "Thank
my daughter was not doing?goodness that we had the guts to do it in the first
Here is what she gained that, sadly, other kids areplace." So, next time you hear about a young child
missing out on. She gained six years of freedom inentering college, I hope you remember this article
life. She is now 21 and doesn't have to sit in abefore offering advice or passing judgment. Does it
classroom for half of her early twenties in order totake a lot of work? Yes, it takes the dedication,
finish her degree. She was never stuck sitting in asupport and efforts of the entire family. There are
classroom from the early hours of morning to thebumps along the way, but the entire process can be
afternoon. She sat in a classroom for three hours andand has been very rewarding.